Music

I recently sent a copy of my jazz band's CD our adoption coordinator. She left me a sweet voice mail thanking me, and saying that not only did they love it, but it sparked an impromptu dance party for her children and her friend's children who were visiting. She said there were 4 adorable Kazakh darlings dancing and twirling to our songs and having an absolute ball! How cool is that?

One of the most enjoyable things for me when my band performs live is when there are children in the audience -- and especially when they start dancing and getting lost in the music. It will be marvelous to share the beauty of music with our child, and see it touch our lives in even more profound ways.

Along those lines, I recently created an iTunes playlist with songs that I find inspiring or touching in regards to the adoption experience. It has been our life soundtrack for the past month! Most of these songwriters probably had very different intended meanings for these songs, but it's nifty how the interpretation can shift so easily. Some of them make me smile, some make me emotional, and others are sentiments that I spiritually send across the world, on the warm summer wind, to our little habibi.

They include:

- L-O-V-E, by Nat King Cole
- Waiting, by the Devlins
- These are Days, by 10,000 Maniacs
- Someone to Watch Over Me, by Willie Nelson
- Faith, Trust and Pixiedust, by Solveig Slettahjell
- Breathe Me, by Sia
- By Your Side, by Sade
- Pink Moon, by Nick Drake
- Sprout and the Bean, by Joanna Newsom
- Mushaboom, by Feist
- Embracable You, by Elena Welch
- Yellow, by Coldplay
- Mr. Sandman, by Anita O'Day
- Here Comes the Sun, by the Beatles
- The Story, by Brandi Carlisle
- Why, by Frankie Avalon
- Upside Down, by Jack Johnson
- Pretty Baby, by Al Jolson
- I Love, by Tom T. Hall
- Mission Bell, by Donnie Brooks
- Dear Someone, by Gillian Welch
- I Believe in You, by Don Williams
- Just Remember I Love You, by Firefall
- I've Got You Under My Skin, by Frank Sinatra
- Songbird, by Eva Cassidy
- The Blower's Daughter, by Damien Rice
- Moonglow, by Vintage Velvet (us!)

P.S. Our dossier was deemed A-OK today! No do-overs. Yahoooo!!!

PAPER PREGNANT!

BOOM-chaka-laka-laka
BOOM-chaka-laka-laka
BOOM-chaka-laka-laka
BOOM!

I think we can say that we are now officially paper pregnant!!! We FedExed the completed dossier today! (Well... yesterday, since it's one minute after midnight.) I gave the sealed envelope a hearty good luck kiss before sending it off on its multi-stop journey. First it goes to our adoption coordinator, who will obtain the apostilles (state certifications) for us on all of the notarized documents. We purchased this service from our agency to ensure that it's done right, and I'm really glad we did because I'm a tad burned out on paperwork right now. Then it gets sent for translation into Russian, and then I'm a little fuzzy on the exact order of its journey to Kazakhstan, but I'll post that when I get it straight.

This was such an exciting step, but I hear that it's very common for dossier papers to be done incorrectly and require a do-over. Eeek! The rules are so rigid (i.e. if the notary's stamp has Jane E. Doe, and she signs it Jane Doe, without the E, then that's not acceptable. Also, the written dates must be spelled out, such as August instead of 8, etc.) But I am a very detail-oriented person, plus we sent proofs to our coordinator for pre-approval, so I'm hopeful that we will get the A+/gold star/good student award the first time around. Please keep your fingers crossed ... and your toes ... and your eyes ... whatever you can cross!

We thank you for all the lovely, kind words and comments on this blog, in person and in e-mails. They truly mean so much to us!

The Eyes Have It

This experience has required us to reflect upon racism more than ever, because our child will most likely have Asian or Eurasian features. (The ethnic background of most of the children available for adoption is Asian-Kazakh; however, occasionally Russian, German, Korean, Tatar and Gypsy children are available. Most children are born of mixed races and there are more than 80 different nationalities in Kazakhstan. It is truly a tapestry of people!)

I'm anticipating that our new parental roles will require us to be better advocates of racial tolerance and equality. Part of our required education is about how to best handle racial insensitivity, and how to teach our child to do the same. I just keep thinking that they are preparing us to deal with something that shouldn’t even exist.

Frank and I look Caucasian enough to not personally have to deal with racism every day of our lives. I'd certainly like to think that we are plenty smart, loving and strong enough to prevent racism, discrimination and bigotry from happening to our child. I also like to think that our child will avoid it simply because he/she will be so amazing and lovable. I even hold out hope that our society is progressing quickly enough for race to be a non-issue. But realistically, it will most certainly happen.

It may be just a stare; it may be a classmate who asks where his/her chopsticks are at lunch; it could be a teacher who makes assumptions about his/her math and science skills; it might be a parent who doesn't want his child to date ours; it could be job discrimination; it may be the spilling of poisonous, hateful words or even violence. Asians face a different type of prejudice than other minority groups in America, but it’s all just as bewildering and disheartening. I can't help but wonder what if we adopt a second child someday who is Hispanic? Middle-Eastern? Black?

“Are you black? I don’t see color. I will assume you’re black because you are telling me you are black. I don't see race; people tell me I'm white and I believe them, because I belong to an all-white country club.”
- Comedian Stephen Colbert to guest Eleanor Holmes Norton

Unlike what my buddy Stephen Colbert jokingly says, I do see race. But what I see is the beautiful diversity of each person’s physical being, and the richness of so many vibrant cultures and customs. It’s like we are all different flowers…none more beautiful than the other. Why do some people need to feel that there is one supreme flower? Why can’t we just live happily nestled all together within our glorious bouquet, appreciating each other’s beauty and realizing how magnificent we are as a whole?

I must say that I truly cannot wait for the moment when I behold the exotic beauty of our child’s face. I can't wait to tenderly kiss those almond eyes, brush that shiny dark hair, and hold against my cheek that soft, sweet skin of a warmer hue. I so look forward to loving and nurturing our lovely little blossom into full bloom, and helping him or her find just the right spot in the world's bouquet.