Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Stirred, Not Shaken

Thanks for all the wonderful comments. They turn us to mush – almost as much as Milo does!

We still cannot access the internet in our apartment. The computer says we have established our dial-up connection, yet it’s just not working. Other families have gotten online from this apartment, and Frank is very computer savvy, so we suspect it’s a Windows Vista thing -- I told you it stinks! (Does anyone have any ideas? Adrian???)

So we still must go to the coffee shop to use their wi-fi. It’s a nice place – as nice as any Starbucks – and seems to be frequented by hip young adults. Because of our limited access and time I’m sorry I haven’t been able to reply to all your e-mails or keep up with other blogs. We will try to catch up soon, and also answer any of your questions in our blog. I hope we can get to the coffee shop every day from now on, but it might be ever other day. You would be surprised at how busy we are just with visiting the baby house twice a day. Our times are from 10-12 am and then 3-5 pm. We get 1 visit on Sundays from 10-12.

We are getting more comfortable with our surroundings. The edges have softened and we have a little routine. There are many nice places here to shop and eat. We have tried a couple, but we have mostly eaten in the apartment and bought a few groceries from the supermarket. The fruit juices and yogurt are fantastic (far better than the US), the bread and jelly are great. We will venture out to some restaurants a bit more now that we are settled. Until now eating and sight-seeing have been the last things on our minds, as just getting through the first 3 or 4 days is all-consuming. But we are ready to start trying more local fare and experiencing more culture.


Ch Ch Ch Ch Changes - We have a big change in travel plans. The adoption laws in Aqtobe have changed recently. The court process here is now just like many of the other regions. Frank and I will both be making 2 trips. For this trip now, we will only be here a total of 15-16 days. Then we will both go home for about a month, and leave Milo here. : ( When we return in about a month for our court date, we will both be here another 3 weeks. Then we will return to the states for good with our son. There are many good sides to this coin – the biggest being that I won’t have to be here alone for a month. But it will be so painful leaving our son behind.

For those who asked why we weren’t staying in the hotel as originally planned, we were strongly encouraged to stay in an apartment for several reasons. If you are coming to Aqtobe and you were planning on staying in a hotel and using your credit card, you need to contact your agency about it. Our apartment is not bad. I just wish we could do something about the constant smell in the toilet room. Luckily it is separate from the shower/sink and has a door. We will post photos of the apartment soon.

Milo is doing great and showing more personality every day. We have not decided on a middle name for him yet. We were hoping to use his Kazakh name, which we will share publicly once our adoption is final, but it just doesn’t work very well with his first and last names (although it is a nice name.)

His vision seems excellent in his good eye. He sees very small things and picks them up. His left eye is usually crossed and his right eye is usually straight, but depending on what he is looking at (how close it is) they can both cross, or the left eye can move out quite a bit and seem to take over. This is rare, but we have seen it. That poor little eye tries so hard to see. ;-)

He has been making lots of eye contact with us. He allows affection, and returns our hugs. In fact he loves hugs! He even loves kisses, and has kissed me back twice, although open-mouthed and slobbery. We cannot tell you how good his hugs feel. It melts us into puddles.

He especially enjoys books, stacking cups, water bottles (likes to peek at me through the plastic or shake them up). He also digs balloons and the ring stacker. He likes to be swung around, held upside down and chased. We go for a walk every visit and he likes being outside. He picks up rocks and gives them to us. He picks the dandelions and has everyone smell them.

He is a thumbsucker, so he has a pretty nice overbite which we actually find really cute. But we can’t wait to get our hands on that mullet haircut!

He eats a ton of food. We sometimes get to feed him or at least watch him feed himself. It’s so entertaining (and sad) to see these kids feed themselves. They sit at these tiny tables in their tiny chairs, with big bibs. Their plates and bowls are put right up to their chests, they are given a big spoon in one and a piece of bread in the other and then they just go at it! He loves to dip his bread in his soup before he takes bites. There is another family in the playroom from France. They are adopting a little blonde 2-year old boy, so he and Milan sit at their little table together and we all gather around them to help and ooh and ahhh at every little slurp. It’s quite the scene. They look like two little old men who are dinner companions. The caretakers prefer that we don’t feed him but instead let him feed himself, but we try to help a lot, as it can only be good in promoting attachment.

We have heard some good babbling the last couple of days, and we have seen him respond to commands in his native language. He has giggled and laughed a lot and seems to have a great sense of humor.

Ok, now what you’ve been waiting for…. Let the next photo montage begin. I hope you're not allergic to awesome!














27 comments:

Karla and Ben said...

Regina & Frank,

I cannot tell you how happy I am that you are adopting Milo. It broke our hearts that we couldn't adopt both him & Erlan. We wanted Milo to find his family too, and he looks like such a perfect match for the two of you. I cannot believe that he is already sitting in Frank's lap. It took Erlan 15 days to sit in Ben's lap! The three of you look very happy. :-)

-Karla

Patrick & Eileen said...

What happy photos!! It got me all teary-eyed :) He is like the perfect little guy for you!

Just keep talking to him and getting him to "talk" back to you. The more he does it the better.

The time will pass quickly and before you know it Milo will be home with you.

Very happy for you!!
Eileen

Chrissy and Russell said...

So cute! So cute! So cute! Oh my gosh, he's so cute!!!! You guys must be completely thrilled.

Sorry to hear about the need for multiple trips. I think if we go to a region like that, we'll do what you're doing and stay after the court date.

Best wishes, Ruopoli family!

Kelly and Sne said...

The photos and the boy are both precious! He looks like such a happy happy boy and seems to be really taking to you two already! Miraz likes his hugs too (even at his age...) so I can understand how it can melt your heart.

Wow, I'm sorry to hear that Aqtobe has now become a "three trip" region too. I just hate it that this process seems to be getting longer and longer and more and more difficult... Though if you're doing 2 trips it is much better to do it this way as you'll have 3 weeks to re-establish that bond. In fact, I'm somewhat envious of the single mom here who is leaving after court on Friday... but she'll be 'picking up' her child in Almaty and then leaving with her a couple of days later! I couldn't even consider doing that without adequate bonding time.

You'll probably be better off in an apartment as it is nice to be able to cook your own food (or store leftovers from restaurants too). I'll bet that Aqtobe is very different from here with all of the foreigners running around throwing their money around too.

I'm also sad that we won't have our moment on Kok-Tobe together. But we'll be thinking of you and missing you, I'm sure. Can't wait for more Milo updates!

marsrob said...

I have tears in my eyes. Milo is DARLING. That smile is incredible and the photo of the 3 of you together - just incredibly moving. YOu all look like you've been together forever.

Well, sounds like you guys are rolling with it - and it is probably going to be brutal to leave Milo for a while - but then you get to go back and bring him home FOREVER. What a precious little boy!!! JOY!

With love.

Kjersten, Steve, Aitugan & Nurai said...

What wonderfully loving photos - especially the lead off shot of Milo and Frank. Frank looks to be breathing Milo in in a way that I remember well from our time at the Baby House.

It sounds as though you all are getting lots of visit time and that is terrific, though as you say, it does make the days busy. We felt very busy with just one 2-hour visit six days a week!

Enjoy your days. Take Care.

Lots of Love,
Steve, KJ, and Tougy

Alysa said...

He is just adorable!!! Love that smile. Fabulous pictures.

The multiple trip thing. I was just told about this too. Looks like I'll miss you in Aqtobe! Darn! I'm a bit confused though. You go back to court, then can come home in 3 weeks? So court, 15-day appeal period, and only a couple of days in Almaty? That's fabulous! But I thought the paperwork process after the appeal period took longer. I was thinking 4-5 weeks total after court...

Glad everything is going so well for you.

Amy said...

Not fair making a girl cry everyday! The pictures are beautiful...and as you say, AWESOME. I am so sorry you'll have to make a second trip, but on the bright side, you can come home get things a little more prepared now that you know your son, and then head back and HE'S YOURS. I didn't like the thoughts of you having to be there alone, or traveling back to the US alone with Milo. It's all the way it should be, so just go with it. Enjoy this special time with your angel boy, I am sure these memories will always be with you. Can't wait to hear more, more more! Haley & Hannah saw the pictures and thought Milo was adorable. Love you both. Big kisses!

Stephanie and Gary said...

Regina and Frank, that first photo of Frank and Milo just hit me hard. It is beautiful and so representative of the bond already there. And then the next one of the water bottle, with you just looking on gleaming. I tell you, the new mom and dad "glow" on the two of you is just popping off the computer screen. The photos are capturing true moments and speak volumes about what is going on over there in Aqtobe and in your hearts. I must ask who is with you that has a camera and is catching some images of all three of you? Simply beautiful! Thanks for making my day!
Steph

Jennifer said...

You guys look so RELAXED! And wonderful. It always drove me crazy when people left me comments saying, "You look like a natural" or "It looks like you've always been a family," but I have to tell you- if I didn't know any better, looking at those pictures, I'd say you guys have been a family for almost 2 years now, and that those pics were taken at home. So heartwarming. My favorite is the very first pic where he's hugging Frank. That is simply amazing. I can just feel the emotion coming from both of them.

Milo is such a doll with a beautiful smile. Thank you for sharing all those photos.

Susan said...

now i just sound like a big ole copy cat cuz I was gonna say what everyone else is saying.

I am SO NOT ALLERGIC TO AWESOME because if I was, i could never look at these pictures! OH MY GOODNESS-he looks like you, Regina.
You are TOTALLY GLOWING....and it's just obvious by Milo's smile that he's glowing too. You all look so happy and like you have been a family forever.
He is just precious and a hugger! I love huggers! :) That must have been why I had a dream about him and he said HI to me clear as day. :)

I would do the trip thing exactly like you are all doing it. It is a bummer it's taking longer, but hey-what are you gonna do. You make the best of it because you cant change it and frettin does no good anyway.

It will be hard to leave Milo, but you can go home, get him some clothes that will fit, and get ready for the trip back to have him home forever.

I was out running errands all morning and first thing i did when i came home was check your blog. :)

I'm sorry Vista sucks-i have it too.

So filled with joy for you and Frank and your son to be Milo.
He is just precious beyond words. :)

Our Family of Bloggers said...

LOVE LOVE LOVE the pics of Milo hugging his Mommy and Daddy. You three all look very relaxed and comfortable with one another. And the smiles in the pictures from your walk outside- truly priceless.
As far as the two trips... there are definitely some positives. Leaving Milo will be really hard, but you can get everything ready for your little guy at home, and now you won't be making the trip home alone either, right? Do I understand that all three of you will come home together? I hope that's true.
Oh, and yeah- so not allergic to awesome here either. I need more.... Please!!! He is just a doll!

Thad and Ann said...

nope, not allergic to awesome here. ;)

The pictures are tear-jerkers..in a great way. :) awww, Milo is just the cutest little guy & you all look so very happy. bummer about the 2 trips but sounds like you are rolling with it which is great. Before you know it you will be on the way home with your little guy.

Amy said...

What a cutie pie!! Sounds like you guys are doing well. Isn't it like Christmas two times a day? Such great news!!!

Did you try the butter? Oh god I miss the butter. Why is it that here the only brand....only brand of butter I can get is Land O'Lakes? No one else makes freaking butter? I have to find a local farm that churns their own butter. Or start doing it myself. Like that is gonna happen.

Dana said...

He looks like such a sweet child! I can see why you are so in love. I am so happy that you are in Kaz and meeting your son. It's just such a wonderful experience. It makes me all mushy reading your blog because it just brings me back to meeting Serena. It's just such a special time. I look forward to reading more and I hope you can start posting from your apartment soon.

Kaz Blog Reader said...

Milo is an awesome addition to your family. He is adorable and I can see his personality come out in just two days of photos. The last photo of Frank swinging him captures his smile so well. He is beautiful. We are so very happy for you guys!!

It sounds like you weathered the first week like champs and are on your way to a great bonding experience.

No doubt about it, saying Paka after bonding will be the hardest thing you do. The time between bonding and court will be challenging, but you will get through it. Try not to focus on it now. We used the time in between trips to get stuff ready and have a few last date nights as we knew them :)

You all look madly in love :)

Angela said...

Man, is he cute! Love those cheeks! In all likelihood, we will have the same two trip schedule as you. Although it means more time traveling on a plane and being away from your child, it seems like a good way to break things up and is not so overwelming. Like, I can pack for 2 weeks much easier than 8!

It really looks like you are having a good time!@ I love the photo of the moms watching the boys eat. Isn't it funny how every little thing they do is fascinating and mesmerizing? Like, "Wow! Look honey, HE PICKED HIS NOSE! Can you believe that? Get the video camera!"

AG said...

HE'S SOOOO CUTE!!!!!
Best looking family I've ever seen.

Leave his mullet alone, it's fashionable in Europe. Actually, I bet if the French dad there with you guys is a young guy he has one too :)

About your internet... it might just be the modem drivers. Make sure you download the updated ones whe you have your WiFi. Are you dialing up a US server?
Frank, make sure you go to the internet settings, and in LAN settings uncheck the automatically detect proxy settings, and make sure you don't have a proxy set up.
one more thing, if you changed an existin dialup instead of creating one from scratch, make sure that "Obtain IP address..." and "obtain DNS..." are checked the IP setting of the dialup connection.

That's probably all I have without looking at the computer :)

Karen, Glenn, Allie, Max, and Sam said...

OMG, look at those hugs!! You must be melting with joy! We are so happy for you, and here is another child who has waited for -- and found -- the perfect family for him. We can attest that it is so hard to be home without Zak Makseem, but we are strengthened by the fact that when we go back, we're not leaving without him. I so echo what others have said about being able to really prepare for him while you're home between trips -- so many details are coming together more clearly now that we know his age and size. The two-trip thing is really working well for us and we will pray that you find that to be the case for yourselves as well. I LOVE his smile (and his name)!

The Kieffers said...

He is sooo cute!!! Yes Frank you are very cute too. Frank's gentle soul has proven itself once again. I remember everyone telling us Rhys looked so big in the pictures, but he is a little guy as you know. I can't wait to see Milo in person. I know he is going to be this adorable little guy.
As for the smell in your bathroom. If you find a true solution you may be a tenge billionaire. It smells that bad because there is no block between any of the toliets in the whole building. Very gross I know. We took candles, bought spray, lit matches and nothing worked still stinky. So close the door, take a deep breath and hold it before you go in. Ah the memories of Kaz are all coming back.

The Kieffer's

Kaz Blog Reader said...

What a darling little boy! And how fun it is to see the bonding as it happens -- and is it happening! You 3 are a team and a family and it warms my heart.

dnd82001 said...

Oh my gosh - very very beautiful - I love the pictures and man you guys look great together, so comfortable & happy, it's so great!

Go with the flow is what everyone keeps saying & you guys are doing just that with everything which makes things easier.

I'm so happy for you three & it is very, very heartwarming. I'm sure you remember the sad times you feel when you think this is never going to happen and then you read a happy family post and it brings the happiness right back knowing that one day that will be us. Thanks for sharing!

Darlene

cindy said...

What big smiles and hugs! You are a beautiful family. Love, Cindy

Kami said...

Oh my he has that "Asian squat" down perfect. How do they sit like that? Even Lincoln does it now. Have you seen adults out an about squatting? It made my legs ache every time I seen someone sitting like that.

The 3 of you look unbelievable happy. I am thrilled to hear bonding is going super well for you guys.

Chris & Christy said...

New shoes? No Orange plastic double his size shoes in today's photos. :)

It is so weird, but something in Milo reminds me so much of Z. Maybe it is his huge smile full of all of those teeth, or his squity little eyes, whatever it is, your photos really warm my heart. Seriously, I love your photos! To see those 2 little boys eating at that tiny table is so darn cute, sad a bit as you said, but really cute! They are such little men! I love the last photo of Frank and Milo walking down the road, Milo is full of laughter, I bet he has ever felt so good in his life. Sad to think that laughing and feeling so loved is probably foreign to them. He is just going to flourish! Man is he cute! As I type this I see that last photo of he and Frank and it just totally gets me.

Are you going to the coffee shop in the Business Center by chance? Or Black and Brown?

Christy

Sam said...

I love how you just said "hope you arent allergic to awesome" you guys are too much! hes a sweetie! what great pics...whos the cameraman

Unknown said...

Wow, you can actually see the love pouring out of those photos. We are so happy for all three of you. We cannot wait to meet Milo in person in a couple of months. Congrats mom and pop!

Devin